Ronald Reagan is Dead

With all of this die-off going on (Kazan, Cash, Ritter, Jump, Palmer, Said, Riefenstahl, Teller, Gibson, O'Connor), I got to thinking: How is it possible Ronald Reagan is still alive? And then it occurred to me: He isn't. He's already dead, but they're not going to announce it until right before the election.

See? No conspiracy theory sounds crazy anymore.

Comments

[Bill]

You don't know how scared I am of the Gipper kicking the bucket. Conservatives are going to act like Christ died when it happens.

I don't deny anyone their right to mourn and memorialize, but Reagan's death is going to kick start an ideological project to put his name and likeness everywhere. There are Grover Norquist-led initiatives to throw his face on currency, on Mt. Rushmore, on the mall in Washington, to name just a few of the common ideas I've heard.

http://chblue.com/Article.asp?ID=2131

[brooke]

kick-start? It's been going on for years. There's ton's of money behind it. Check it - The Ronald Reagan Legacy Project has been at it for a decade. reagan on Rushmore, Reagan on The Mall, a Reagan altar in every state in the union.

See? It's totally plausible that they're holding out. Isn't it? Isn't it?

Alternative conspiracy theory:

Reagan died last month, but Karl Rove is able to keep the Gipper in a state of zombie-like undead preservation until such time as the Republicans require a sentimentality-induced boost in the polls. Rove is accomplishing this by personally sucking out the souls of other celebrities and feeding them to Reagan. Reagan believes that he is eating tapioca pudding. Hence the rash of celebrity deaths.
Note that the pope's not looking too well, either.
He's next.

[Frank]

Dammit. :-) Okay, that's twice now you've gotten me with your headline. I scan the headlines and it just jumps out at me, the more so because of the current crop of folks who have recently shuffled off.

[brooke]

Dude. My bad. Reagan died in 2001. Look, CNN says so.

That's not even an article from CNN. I don't think Reagan is dead yet...

[Rachel]

"freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away form extinction" -Ronald Reagan.
Take a few minutes and count the liberties we have lost in the last 20 years and you too will mourn the loss of a man who fought so hard to preserve it. He was not Christ to Republicans, he was liberty and freedom in it's purest sense. Take it from someone who works in the Constitutional Law arena, our lives and the lives of all Americans are much richer because of Ronald Reagan. Please do yourself a favor, look past party lines and take the time to find out who he really was and what he really stood for, your life will be better for it.

[reignman]

Well, he's dead now.

[brooke]

Hooray!

[cheryl]

Well...FREE AT LAST!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Heavy]

Ronald Reagan was a moron, who cares?

[killacorean]

WHo carez i dun giv a shiet about americanz phaqkin reagan hope more americanz die in iraq + getz their headz beheaded phaqkin biatchz

[Nancy]

Ding dong, the bastard's gone! He couldn't have died soon enough or painful enough to make up for all the evil and pain he inflicted on people while he was in the white house.

[Zoid]

"Free at last!!!", eh? "The bastard's gone!", eh?

This just shows how morally repugnant and intellectually bankrupt you liberals are.

[cha-cha]

He acted his way to the White House, but he sho' can't ACT his way to heaven!!!!!!

You are a friggin nutcase man.

I'm glad I don't know any of you people. You are all a bunch of assholes.

Thank Christ that bolus of shit is dead. Now to flush him and forget him. Good riddance.

Well I thought That Republicans were supposed to be hate-filled and malicious.

Remember morons, if you can't beat them join them.
You couldn't beat Reagan, so why don't you join him and die!

[Brian]

He is a Christ to many. He was a rotten president that cared about nothing except himself. I was working and borrowing money to pay my way through college during Reaganomics and he was just a jerk period. Remember this was the guy so petty that he wanted ketchup to be considered a vegetable for the public school lunch programs. I guess his idea of a balanced school lunch was ketchup (veggie), jam (fruit), peanut butter (protein-meat) white bread, chocolate milk (dessert). He did nothing to get funding during the AIDS crises and didn't realize that the government's role was saving lives not souls. And who the hell cares if he is dead? People die everyday and people much more intelligent and compassionate that he die without any media hoopla and whop de do. He was a man period not a God but he is the god to many and this is the sadest part of his death - bringing the crazies out to make him a martyr for their cause. He also was senile for at least the last half of his second term. I knew it then. His speech, stumbling of words and general inability to communicate. You could tell something was wrong. The truth of his dementia during office will come out at some point in the future. And on a nasty note Nancy was a bitch all around period. He performed his ultimate character acting goal POTUS which he did not perform well. Just wondering if he agent got his cut from this eight year acting job.

[Adrian]

Look, conservatives are extremely morally bankrupt, and it's hard to shed a tear for who and what they represent. Republicans think that Reagan was a god, and fine, maybe us liberals have been godless for too long, but his policies were still wrong. He promoted murder in Nicaragua, and my hometown in Costa Rica is flooded with Nicaraguans whom have no relatives save their wives and children because "communism is bad". I'm not a radical person, but I will say that Reagan killed and damned lives (not to mention the economy), reflecting on the insensitivity of conservatives.

The worst part is that many people that believe in Reagan also believe in Jesus. Well JESUS,people! Don't you see it? Jesus would've started a revolution of peace, and ANY conservative would have him dead RIGHT HERE AND NOW because he would've been some brand of "radical terrorist". I'm a shameful American, and while I'm proud of what the USA's become, I hate what conservatives are doing to it. I'm not Christian, but I believe in what Jesus says.

George Bush ≠ Jesus
War ≠ Peace and reconstruction
Money ≠ Morals
Reagan ≠ Lifes of thousands of Nicaraguans

Call liberals morally bankrupt, well, stop exloiting Jesus for war, Jesus for money, Jesus for your guns and golf clubs. Jesus was a peaceful man, not a conservative. And it's one or the other.

[Adrian]

Look, conservatives are extremely morally bankrupt, and it's hard to shed a tear for who and what they represent. Republicans think that Reagan was a god, and fine, maybe us liberals have been godless for too long, but his policies were still wrong. He promoted murder in Nicaragua, and my hometown in Costa Rica is flooded with Nicaraguans whom have no relatives save their wives and children because "communism is bad". I'm not a radical person, but I will say that Reagan killed and damned lives (not to mention the economy), reflecting on the insensitivity of conservatives.

The worst part is that many people that believe in Reagan also believe in Jesus. Well JESUS,people! Don't you see it? Jesus would've started a revolution of peace, and ANY conservative would have him dead RIGHT HERE AND NOW because he would've been some brand of "radical terrorist". I'm a shameful American, and while I'm proud of what the USA's become, I hate what conservatives are doing to it. I'm not Christian, but I believe in what Jesus says.

George Bush ≠ Jesus
War ≠ Peace and reconstruction
Money ≠ Morals
Reagan ≠ Lifes of thousands of Nicaraguans

Call liberals morally bankrupt, well, stop exloiting Jesus for war, Jesus for money, Jesus for your guns and golf clubs. Jesus was a peaceful man, not a conservative. And it's one or the other.

[Adrian]

hehehe whoops posted it twice

conservatives=the roman empire

Raegan=caesar

GWBush= vomitorium janitor turned Caesar

[kayaktony]

http://www.opinionjournal.com/editorial/feature.html?id=110005204

http://www.nationalreview.com/script/printpage.asp?ref=/moore/moore200406070926.asp

http://www.townhall.com/columnists/anncoulter/ac20040610.shtml

You people are sad. Anything to be "noticed". Here's a good way to get noticed...Move out of your parent's basement and get a job. Blindly raining praise on a man's death is simply evidence of your sad existence. Maybe it is just too much for you to realize that nobody would notice if you losers dropped off the face of the earth today.

You arbitrarily throw unsubstantiated "facts" about Reagan's administration, such as his funding of AIDS projects (which were in fact, quite extensive). Do yourself a favor, toss off the sheep's hide and get out of the herd of ill-informed flock of mindless zombies.

Don't simply believe everything you hear. Actually do some research. Too many people turn on the news and believe the hogwash they are presented with by idiots like Dan Rather.

Coming here and bashing a man and celebrating his death does nothing but expose you as the mindless, uninformed loser that you truly are.

Oh yeah, I'd like a large fry and a Coke, please...you burger flipping turd.